Winter Conversations ..... Cold + Dark = Quiet Wisdom

Tonight a friend stopped in to talk.  It wasn’t a chat.  He needed to talk.  

He spoke about feeling lonely, not alone. He spoke specifically about feeling lonely. The lonely that happens when you make decisions that other’s might not agree on as the best option. The lonely that happens when after 10 minutes no one has texted or called. The lonely that occurs when winter hits and you cannot go outside.

The Lonely ~ the lonely that hits even when you are surrounded by a dozen friends, in the company of your life partner, when you sit in a meeting of peers at work, the lonely that hits when your family doesn’t see you.  It is the lonely that happens at birth and arrives to finally meet you at death. It is the lonely that is the ‘curse’ of being human in the current world. Let’s be honest the lonely that has been here for generation after generation.  It is the lonely that drives us to kill not only each other but also this planet and its animals.  Those animals we are jealous of because they do not know loneliness.  The dogs, cats, wolves, deer, eagles, elephants, and other animals that understand aloneness + community does NOT = loneliness.

Right now we are all feeling alone in America. Many can raise their hands high in acknowledgement that NO one has heard them for years.  They may never admit they are lonely. They will stand tall + swagger but we can all see past the veneer. This hoopla around our next President isn't the cause only the visible ulcer.  This goes far deeper and wider.

Loneliness is personal and universal.  We came in alone by not lonely.  We will die alone yet it we don’t have to be lonely.  

Loneliness is driven by the denial of self value. Our current culture (especially western white culture) does not nurture a whole self identity. It does not understand the value of the connection to our inner self. Because of this it perpetuates the denial of the value of Community as nurturer and the self within that community. The Quakers used the identifiers of Thee and Thou to bring inclusion into the self thus creating the understanding of the value of self within the community.  Many religious practices exclude self, deny the value of nurturance, and through the exclusion create a community of loneliness.  

Standing Rock exposes the loneliness within our culture. As a cultural phenomenon to the western world, Standing Rock shows how the acceptance of the value of self within a community through ancestral spiritual practices of inclusion, loneliness is removed and courage, integrity, self love, and the ability to value all life is expressed in daily interactions.  

We are not all of First Nation blood so what could my friend do to help embrace his loneliness?  

There are options available ~ A spiritual practice to quiet the mind and connect the higher self to him. A spiritual practice that allows for interaction between the higher self and him releasing the long held generational beliefs. A spiritual practice that gives value to community.

A willingness to say I no longer want to exclude myself.  A willingness to see the pain of loneliness in others, especially those we believe are not lonely. 

A clearer understanding of the concept “we create our experiences” and it is within our control to banish or build all aspects of our life.

Finding his ancestral spiritual lineage.  

There are many other options available to grasp the loneliness we experience. Each are individual as to their benefit.  There is no One Size Fits All.  I suggested he try many different avenues to find the right fit. The one that draws him, intrigues him.  Intrigue will fuel his desire to embrace his loneliness. His loneliness, when embraced, will bring to the world compassion and right action.

The dark, cold winter is designed for reflection. It doesn’t allow distractions to take our pains away. It refuses to hear the excuses and demands we find the courage to take a stand. Winter is our best ally in forming our convictions. If you can turn and face the adversary in the dark + cold, you can face them in light and ease.

No one is ever alone. There may be times when you feel loneliness. Remember many are here with you right now in this moment. Shine brighter.

Traveling on,
Teri ~ The Soul Traveler

Time and Time and ..... Time Again

"Make me your friend," Time whispers.  "Don't hate me for not filling your day fuller, or so full you can't breathe. Remember I am but the limits you believe exist."

We wander through life following a clock.  We are taught to set goals for the future and remember the past.  We are not told how to live in the present.

Time is presented to us as a dictator.  We are led to believe that we must rush through our life succumbing to its will.  The sound of our mother's heartbeat from the womb is replaced by the tick ticking of an inanimate object.  Driven by a set number we rush through our life only occasionally rebelling against its chains.  We think Time requires us to be lead around in a constant circle.  

We practice meditation daily only to run off to the next appointment we managed to squeeze in to yet another day. How often do we purposely bring the non-time of meditation into our work day or weekend plans?

Each of us has our own perspective of Time.  We use it to accomplish our living, mark memories or milestones, and allow it to lead us forward.

Time does not exist.  It is our buy-in to segment our life that determines its control.  If Time doesn't exist then what does that really mean + why would we care?

Our ancestors used Time as a natural rhythm.  Sleep + waking were the determining points.  The sun came up, they rose.  Sun set, they slept.  As days lengthened hunting + planting lasted longer. Days shortened hunting became a quick sport and they relied upon what harvest came from the plantings of the longer days.  There was not a giant clock nailed to the trees, ticking away to drive their days.  They marked their lives from the seasons and rhythms of the sun + moon.  The stars portended the future.  The moon reminded them of the day just ended ~ the past.  Their present was marked by the sun as it moved across the sky.

Now we live here with the aspect of Time glaring down from his mighty perch, barking out measured steps to be completed each day.  Our children's arrivals are measured in weeks, the longer calculation, instead of the vagueness of months.  There is a celebration for every passage of time.  Constantly we are shown the greatness of Time.  A languished moment is heralded with criticism and offered up as a treat.

How we got here would be another 10 pages.  How we arrived is not as important as how we release this dependency on Time.  We can all agree we are in a world running faster and faster.  We are totally enmeshed in the barbs of time.

Each of us use some form of meditation.  These practices are generally our first introduction to moving out of time. As we leave our meditations we sense the calm space, an altered space, surrounding us and it appears to be drifting away.  You experience this same sensation when you are caught up in something enjoyable and not so enjoyable.  It is the altered state of full immersion into the Present that lengths or shortens our concept of time. Time truly is an illusion.  Playing with that illusion will break down the mental and physical constraints.  

Try for 45 days a few of these games and see what transpires.  Nothing tricky or 'time-consuming' to this play.     Enjoy ~

1.) Rid yourself of all clocks. Yes turn your phone over :)

2.) Each traffic light you approach that is RED state: 'Change, change, change'.  Make note each time it changes to green.

3.) Each traffic light you approach that is GREEN state: 'Stay, stay, stay'. Make note of the times it stays green and you pass on through.

4.) Using the appointments you have during a week, pick one each day (even if the only one is getting to + from work) as you head to the appointment say, "Stretch, stretch, stretch'. Make a note when you arrive with time to spare and when you don't.

Each week during the 45 days review your results.  Mark down any feelings or reactions recording when one was easy, fun or difficult.  Note any resistance.  These simple exercises will asset you in learning how to stretch time, fold time, and break down the assertion that Time exists.

Learning to play will help shift your mind & its reality of the need for time and heighten your bodies acceptance of freedom.  Time play + shifting = a mental, physical, and spiritual understanding of what is reality.

Traveling on out of time ~

Teri ~ The Soul Traveler